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Was Paul a Virgin?

It is almost universally held that Paul was a single man through his life and so a virgin who endorsed singleness and virginity in others. Students are usually very surprised when I tell them in class that the Apostle Paul was very possibly previously married. There are a couple of reasons for this.

First, Paul was a Pharisee, and usually, a Pharisee was married. Barrett writes, “[u]nmarried rabbis were few, and marriage appears to have been obligatory for a Jewish man” (Barrett, 1 Corinthians, 161). Of course, he may have converted before he married, so this isn’t conclusive proof. Still, there are other factors.

A second is that the Greek of 1 Cor 7:8–9 could well indicate he was a widower. The passage reads in the ESV: “To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am.” The Greek for unmarried is agamos. This term can mean unmarried in a general sense or “widower.”

Third, connected with the previous point, throughout 1 Cor 7:1–17 Paul neatly balances male and female spouses (esp. 7:3–4, 10–11, 12–16). If he is being true to the balancing, the natural balance point to the widow would be the widower not the single in a general sense. So, here he would have in mind the widower and widows in the church.

Thiselton (1 Corinthians, 516) notes a fourth factor. In the Roman culture at the time, a widow was expected to remarry within a year (Rousselle, A History of Women, 296–336). Widowers were similarly expected to marry quickly because of property issues, procreation, status, and low life-expectancy. Augustus and Tiberius were concerned about birthrate which added to the pressure. Paul, then, maybe speaking into the situation urging them that singleness is a real option despite this pressure; in fact, it is preferable, as in his own case—one who is not married can be fully devoted to the Lord’s mission.

Scholars remain divided over the question so we cannot be sure. Yet, if we go with the view that agamos means single it has to be conceded that the text can mean widower. If so, Paul was formerly married but sadly, his wife has passed on. There is no evidence of children of Paul, so she may have died very quickly after marriage or was barren.

If he was married, when we read Paul talking about sexuality, he may not have been a virgin himself. This shifts our perception from some idealist celibate telling people how to live to one who knows the “pleasures” of marriage urging people to be celibate outside of marriage. When talking about marriage and the relationships of husband and wife, again, he is not merely a theorist and idealist. He may have experienced married life. Finally, it deepens our sense that Paul was a man who knew pain and suffering not only from the many struggles in his ministry (see esp. 1 Cor 11) but through the death of his wife. My observation of those who have lost a spouse is that it marks them deeply. So, when we read of Paul’s wisdom in suffering, which is astonishing, perhaps he is one that those who have lost a spouse can identify with.

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